First Flight

< align=center><FONT face=\"Times New Roman, Times, serif\" size=+1>Imitate Birds</FONT></P><BR>
* I6 A; N* I- h1 s: g2 H<TABLE cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=0 width=370 border=0>

<TR>
5 K+ H$ f2 q( y<TD>
<><FONT face=\"Times New Roman, Times, serif\">A man tried to get a job in a stage show. \"What can you do?\" asked the producer. </FONT>
<><FONT face=\"Times New Roman, Times, serif\">\"Imitate birds,\" the man said. </FONT>
<><FONT face=\"Times New Roman, Times, serif\">\"Are you kidding?\" answered the producer, \"eople like that are a dime a dozen.\" </FONT>
<><FONT face=\"Times New Roman, Times, serif\">\"Well, I guess that\'s that.\" said the actor, as he spread his arms and flew out the window. </FONT></P></TD></TR></TABLE>

< align=center>模仿鸟儿</P><BR>
<TABLE cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=0 width=350 border=0>
# I1 n3 L2 z' j0 \! w7 i
, h) H7 k* c4 i' w0 q8 I<TR>
' M; t+ ~2 _# W* Z  o" v5 G! A<TD>
<>　　一个人想在一个舞台剧中找份工作。“你能干什么呢？”负责人问。
<>　　“模仿鸟儿，”那人说。
9 z9 l6 t2 W' P. D. w/ G<>　　“你在开玩笑吧？”负责人答道，“那样的人一毛钱可以找一打。”
$ ~- Q" r2 d: ?6 r1 n<>　　“噢，那就算了。”那名演员说着，展开翅膀，飞出了窗口。</P></TD></TR></TABLE>

< align=center><FONT face=\"Times New Roman, Times, serif\" size=+1>How Did You Ever Get Here</FONT></P><BR>
6 B$ c$ e' P, Z9 Q* U. P7 }<TABLE cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=0 width=370 border=0>
4 ]: C. z% o& f, z9 j& J9 i
1 y- @6 ]% E! `' a<TR>
<TD>
/ U- u$ v7 j# A' K<><FONT face=\"Times New Roman, Times, serif\">One winter morning, an employee explained why he had shown up for work 45 minutes late. \"It was so slippery out that for every step I took ahead, I slipped back two.\" </FONT>
8 H- a6 }! `3 |5 K$ P<><FONT face=\"Times New Roman, Times, serif\">The boss eyed him suspiciously. \"Oh, yeah? Then how did you ever get here?\" </FONT>
<><FONT face=\"Times New Roman, Times, serif\">\"I finally gave up,\" he said, \"and started for home.\" </FONT></P></TD></TR></TABLE>

< align=center>你是怎样来的？</P><BR>
* j% m' S, b9 o/ S* f3 K5 {3 U<TABLE cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=0 width=350 border=0>

<TR>
<TD>
% C& M' ~' _! b' s<>　　一个冬天的早晨，一名雇员解释他为什么迟到了四十五分钟才起来上班。“外面太滑了，我每向前迈一步，就要向后退两步。”
<>　　老板狐疑地看着他。“噢，是吗？那你是怎样到这里来的？”
' Q, [. M& P4 ~' C( @0 ]7 F" }<>　　“后来我决定放弃，”他说，“然后我就往家里走。” </P></TD></TR></TABLE>

< align=center><FONT face=\"Times New Roman, Times, serif\" size=+1>Three Surgeons</FONT></P><BR>
. [) X6 o. @  ]+ c. q! ~<TABLE cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=0 width=370 border=0>
8 C: K2 H' d. y3 z
3 p, l% |) r/ O0 T& e' b7 ]1 z3 S<TR>
( ^8 [/ v* h: [: D<TD>
( Y6 s8 n. w' j6 q9 a+ A" }<><FONT face=\"Times New Roman, Times, serif\">Three famous surgeons were bragging about their skills. \"A man came to me who had his hand cut off,\" said one. \"Today that man is a concert violinist.\" </FONT>
( M6 ~( i' \( ?9 O' s# u<><FONT face=\"Times New Roman, Times, serif\">\"That\'s nothing,\" said another. \"A guy came to me who had his legs cut off. I stitched them back on, and today that man is a marathon runner.\" </FONT>
<><FONT face=\"Times New Roman, Times, serif\">\"I can top both of you,\" said the third. \"One day I came on the scene of a terrible accident. There was nothing left but a horse\'s posterior - and a pair of glasses. Today that man is seated in United States Senate.\" </FONT></P></TD></TR></TABLE>

< align=center>三个外科医生</P><BR>
<TABLE cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=0 width=350 border=0>
# g* O" V6 D! t$ C5 G6 i
<TR>
1 z+ L5 j* ^# t* w; g<TD>
1 Q, T8 w6 q3 J' q4 p* y/ H<>　　三个有名的外科医生正在吹嘘他们的技术。“一个人断了一只手，他来找我，”一个说，“如今那个人是个音乐会的小提琴手。”
<>　　“这算不了什么，”另一个说。“一个家伙两条腿断了，他来找我，我将它们接了回去。如今，那人是马拉松选手。”
<>　　“我比你们两个都强，”第三个说，“一天，我碰到一起可怕的车祸。除了一个马屁股，和一幅眼睛，什么都没有留下。如今，那人坐在美国参议院里。”</P></TD></TR></TABLE>

< align=center><FONT face=\"Times New Roman, Times, serif\" size=+1>One Side of the Case</FONT></P><BR>
0 o7 u9 ^+ l) X1 z7 _: ?1 ]# L<TABLE cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=0 width=370 border=0>
* C7 z' b& {, G) O( V: r  k
<TR>
1 i7 v# S- E' N* [. M<TD>
; K4 v% \7 j: E. Q" o<><FONT face=\"Times New Roman, Times, serif\">A judge asked our group of potential jurors whether anyone should be excused, and one man raised his hand. </FONT>
, d8 p6 J  d. K8 S# j<><FONT face=\"Times New Roman, Times, serif\">\"I can\'t hear out of my left ear,\" the man told the judge. </FONT>
<><FONT face=\"Times New Roman, Times, serif\">\"Can you hear out of your right ear?\" the judge asked. The man nodded his head. </FONT>
<><FONT face=\"Times New Roman, Times, serif\">\"You\'ll be allowed to serve on the jury,\" the judge declared. \"We only listen to one side of the case at a time.\" </FONT></P></TD></TR></TABLE>

< align=center>一面之辞</P><BR>
<TABLE cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=0 width=350 border=0>
* Y: i( j* [' d& O
: w( H5 R6 N2 m+ w9 N<TR>
8 j* }# Q& [: j6 r4 K<TD>
<>　　一位法官问我们这群修补陪审员是否有人应当免权。一个人举起了手。
<>　　“我的左耳听不见。”那人告诉法官。
<>　　“你的右边耳朵听得见吗？”法官问道。那人点了点头。
: F& }/ {" @% U$ k9 z% e5 A2 Q) k! ?! C<>　　“你将被允许加入陪审团，”法官宣布。“我们每次只听一面之辞。” </P></TD></TR></TABLE>